Gin & I got off task the other night during a business meeting. (DID YOU KNOW WE ARE IN BUSINESS??! More on that later!). We were talking about why we were so tired. Gin has a legit reason to crave those zzz’s- a sweet boy waking every 2-3 hours!
Thank goodness, my kids have finally fallen into a decent sleep pattern (knock on wood, cuz it’s been a long sleep battle!).
So why so tired?
I couldn’t quite pinpoint it, but I’m always seeking the answers. I go to bed at a decent time. I can leave the dishes in the sink for 1-4 days. I relax often. I don’t have the kids in any activities. I work 20-30 hours per week, half from home. I meditate. I drink 1 cup of coffee (with heavy whipping cream, YES!). I eat darn tootin’ clean (minus corn chips, chocolate, and wine!). I drink sufficient water. Once every 2 weeks I stay up too late, but for the most part I’m in bed by 1030.
So the tiredness. Why!?
I had an epiphany today. I figured out where some of the tiredness comes from…while I was jumping on the trampoline with my kids. In pure ecstasy…It occurred to me.
I am tired:
Because I am a mom.
Because I am a kid. (Or at least I try to be one!)
Because I am a chef.
Because I am a wife.
Because I am a friend.
Because I am a worker.
Because I am a connector, craving moments with family, friends, people.
Because I move things from room to room. (Still not great at the whole cleaning thing.)
Because this list can go on for all of us. Any mom. Any Aunt. Any grown woman or any person who cares for another, truly.
As moms (aunts, friends, women) we are all wearing so many hats. The hats can be amazing, happy hats, but switching hats can be a little tiring. Back before kids when I was always the same person, living just for myself, I didn’t change hats as often. I worked, went to school, and did what I wanted when I wanted to- the focus was inwards. There wasn’t as much gear changing, butt wiping, and meal prepping. Less hat switching.
I am in LOVE with my hats. I WANT to wear these hats. Sometimes I want to wear them all at once!!! I am not in denial, nor am I complaining. I chose to wear these hats in my life. But that is where the tiredness comes in, at least for me, from the switching of hats, or gears, or whatever ya want to call it.
photo taken on a giddy happy evening
I am so grateful for these hats, and for my kids. Because without kids I would probably not own a trampoline, nor spend hours on it laughing my booty off. Because without kids I would not have dance parties as funky and loud as we do. Because without my kids my heart wouldn’t be as open, happy, light, and flowing.
The hat switching can also be a re-fueling in a sense… Because with kids you bet your buttons you just gotta keep on going. You just gotta! Mommy can’t lay on the floor for more than 17 seconds before she gets mobbed by two dirty hug giving cave people with sticky hands and faces. Tonight we cracked the egg on the trampoline for days and listened to Day-O on repeat dancing our buns off. That’s my idea of a good night.
That high is worth all the hat switching in the world.